When my focus slips from within me, I exist temporarily solely on the outside, a representative of what I do not know, a physical force with nothing behind it. My daily existence, my mundane tasks define everything that I am.
It is hard to keep the focus inward, when the world outside demands your constant attention. Sometimes you have to shut it out, stopple your mind, and just breathe.
We have developed a world that battles with us constantly for our energy, attention, and time. All of our spare moments spent watching something, doing something, playing something, smoking something. To turn off all of this extraneous noise takes the self-discipline of a monk at times.
Often I just sit and stare into this empty computer screen, waiting for the need to write to grow strong enough for something to explode out of me like it was meant to be. But then I close the window and play a game or watch a movie instead. Because I did not have the patience to sit and listen and wait for the words to come.
It takes struggle to transcend. It takes patience to get beyond the surface. It takes discipline to chisel out the god within.
How I need to be reminded of this, every single day.